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Artworks ship within 14 days of purchase or upon conclusion of the show.
You'll receive confirmation of shipping and delivery via email.
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Artwork Description
Description
The feelings I tried so hard to ignore and push down manifested into anger, rage, envy, resentment, and cruelty. In my 20s, I learned that it’s better to let my feelings out than to hold them in, but by this point, I had developed unhealthy ways of coping with my intense emotions. I spent too much of my adult life disliking who I was, envying people who seemed happier than me, constantly seeking external validation, and feeling I would never be good enough.
Not being able to get pregnant really exacerbated my mental illness. I started seeing my therapist when we moved out to rural western NJ, because I struggled to cope with switching art teacher jobs from a charter school in Harlem to TWO public elementary schools in suburban NJ. Soon after, she was helping me deal with the emotional fallout of learning that I had primary infertility due to Stage 3 Endometriosis. When I was going through IVF, I begged my doctor to put me on psychiatric medication because I couldn’t handle the emotional roller coaster of (what felt like) everyone I know getting pregnant around me. Then came the moment that would change my life forever: Aurora’s tragic, unexpected death just 3 days after she and her identical twin turned 2 months old. My entire existence was decimated the moment the ER doctor told me he couldn’t do anything more to revive my baby.
It sucks that it took this immeasurable and heartbreaking tragedy to get me to prioritize myself and my mental health. I continue to see my therapist who’s helped me to gain more insight on my layers of trauma.
I did not intend to make a painting that perfectly encapsulates my daily struggles with mental health. However, the longer I looked at it, this is what I saw: The top 2/3 of the painting is what it’s like to live with anxiety, depression, and all the intense emotions that accompany mental illness (& not to mention, grief & trauma).
But among the trees, there’s one tree standing alone, underneath the vibrant, colorful Aurora Borealis. The other trees seem unaffected and unmoved by the explosion of colors up above, as if the lone tree is the only one seeing the Aurora. I think this tree is me.
Artist Information
Bio
Angelina Salgado is visual artist and art educator, based in NJ. The eldest daughter of Filipino immigrants, Angelina was born and raised in New York. She received her AAS in Fine Arts from the Fashion Institute of Technology, pursued a double major in Art History and Studio Art at Hunter College, then earned her Master’s degree in Art and Museum Education from the City College of New York. She has taught in several art museums and cultural institutions across NYC, including the Metropolitan Museum of Art, the Museum of Modern Art, and the Brooklyn Museum. She brought her eclectic experience in art and museum education to the elementary art classroom, first, at a charter school in Harlem, then, two elementary public schools in Northern NJ. She continues to teach art, although no longer to small children. Angelina leads paint and puff classes with Garden State of Mind. She paints everyday, and her artwork has been featured in gallery exhibitions in New York City and northern New Jersey. Her first art fair was Superfine NYC in September 2023, and she is manifesting Art Basel for 2024!Artist Statement
My baby, Aurora Annette, died unexpectedly, three days after she and her identical twin sister were 2 months old. I alchemize my grief into colorful paintings, inspired by the Aurora Borealis, and each one dedicated to Aurora Annette. Through my art, I explore and externalize the complexities and layers of grief. My grief is exacerbated by my past trauma. For over 3 years, I struggled with infertility due to Endometriosis stage 3. I had two invasive surgeries, 10 months apart. After which, I endured a cycle of in-vitro fertilization, leading to a high risk pregnancy & emergency c-section 7 weeks early. Because my babies were born premature, they stayed in the NICU for a month before coming home. On September 24, we found her limp and unresponsive. Her death was ruled as Sudden Unexplained Infant Death. My art has become the primary outlet for my grief and emotions in losing my baby so unexpectedly.Light and dark, although total opposites, coexist in nature. Similarly, joy and grief can coexist after the death of your child. My grief journey and my art practice have become intertwined and inform each other. Painting every single day allows me to explore, express, and externalize the emotions and trauma from losing Aurora, from no longer being a twin mom, and from the ways Endometriosis and infertility have impacted my life. However, it’s in realizing we need both light and dark to live a full and complete life. You need to acknowledge the presence and necessity of the dark, in order to see the stars. The optimal light conditions for seeing the Aurora Borealis are far from bright city lights, in the darkest regions of the Arctic. Just as in order to truly see the colorshift in my artwork, you must endure the darkness of my grief.
Shipping & Returns
Shipping is free on all orders.
Artworks ship within 14 days of purchase or upon conclusion of the show.
You'll receive confirmation of shipping and delivery via email.
You have 14 days to request a return and another 14 days to return the artwork. For more details, please review our full Return Policy.
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